Hello to anyone and everyone who may have stumbled across my blog! My name is Katie, and I'm 19 years old. I'm also overweight. Quite a bit, actually. Two days ago I started an informal diet and exercise plan. Before you ask, no, I'm not anorexic. And no, I'm not bulemic. I'm not a professional, and I'm not here to tell you what to do to lose weight. I'm here to share my experience, and if you'd like, you may follow my lead at your own risk.
I'll tell you a little about myself:
By the time I hit the 5th grade, I was 145lbs and 4'9". I was sick all the time, and extremely overweight for a kid my age and height. It was terrible, and I wasn't even aware of my condition. In the 6th grade, I was adopted. My new parents made me exercise every day. I spent 20 minutes a day on their elliptical. I was only allowed ONE diet soda a day. My mom cooked healthy meals. I even got into performing arts and soccer.
By the time I hit 9th grade and went into high school, I was 105lbs. Amazing, I lost 40lbs. By the time I graduated high school, I was 120lbs, and 4'11". That's not too bad at all. Maintaining my weight has always been a struggle, but I promised myself I would never gain my freshman 15 when I went to college.
I did. Not only did I gain my freshman 15, but I gained my freshman 40+. Yes, it's true. I got off into college life and ate and ate and ate. Fast food is my mortal enemy, and I have the world's biggest sweet tooth.
I suffer from clinical depression and bipolar disorder. It's hard, and most of the time, I comfort myself by binge eating. I make more than a couple trips to the refrigerator to snack and gorge myself on food. Afterwards, I usually feel guilty and wish I hadn't eaten it. I've been told that I'm not fat, and I'm pretty, etc. I know I'm kinda pretty. I know I'm not fat...
But I'm chunky, I'm overweight, and I'm unhappy with myself.
Unhappy.
That's the worst part, and I don't care what anyone tells me. I'm not healthy.
A couple of days ago, I decided it was time to change. I'm starting to realize that I can't fit into my clothes anymore. I'm just gaining and gaining and gaining. I just want to be able to shop for clothes and not cry when I stand in front of the mirror. I want to be able to sit down and not see two huge rolls on top of two huge thighs. I want to be able to not feel myself jiggle when I walk, laugh, run, or jump. I want to be able to wear all the cute clothes out there, and look good in them. I want my boyfriend's friends to be so jealous of him they can't stand it. I want so many things, and the answer is simple:
Motivation. There's an Australian woman out there somewhere with a blog called thinspiration.blogspot.com. I stumbled across her sight while Googling diet and exercise plans. Her blog is dedicated to pictures of thin people in order to motivate others to lose weight. I sat and cried as I flipped through the pages online, and finally decided, this is it. This is what I want, and this is what I NEED.
I found through her blog that she also has a Formspring account, in which you can ask her anything you want. The woman is a true role model. She's an open book, dedicated to helping and inspiring other women who were in her position. She eats healthy, and exercises, and helps others do the same.
I made a Formspring, too, so that I could comment on her's and tell her that she has inspired and motivated me to try and lose weight. I got p90x, and I'm going to start small with basic workouts and fasting, then work my way up to the harder stuff.
In two days, I have lost 5lbs. My boyfriend, Bryan, decided he is going to do it with me, and honestly, it's a million times better/easier to do it with a partner. He encourages me, and I encourage him. In a day, he lost 5lbs.
This is fantastic! I'm so excited I can hardly stand it. I just keep telling myself, "It isn't about if I get skinny, it's about WHEN I get skinny."
I'm going to lose my fat cheeks and double chin. I'm going to lose my gut. I'm going to have a flat, toned stomach. I'm going to be able to walk without my thighs rubbing against one another. I'm going to be able to fit my arms into long sleeves. I'm going to be able to wear jeans again. I'm going to be thin, and healthy, and happy, and it's only a matter of time. :)
I've decided:
It's December 2, 2011. I'm going to lose 2lbs every day until Christmas. That's 50lbs by Christmas, since I started on November 30. By Christmas, if I try really hard, and push myself, I will be at 110lbs.
110lbs.
110lbs....
WOW. I can hardly believe it...
And if I get off track, so be it. I'll push myself twice as hard the next day. So far, I'm doing crunches, sit ups, push ups, and stretches at home in the private comfort of my apartment. I'm jogging in place, then to the other side of my apartment, jogging in place, back to the other side, and repeating. I'm even going to the campus recreation center to go rock climbing! I'm going to do everything I can to make it down to 110, and then, if I want to lose more, I will.
I will not just try, but I will succeed. :)
xoxo,
Katie
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